Still staying

Thank you for praying for "F". An amazing thing took place in my home last night. She and about 30 others from her region of the world came to dinner for the eating of an entire lamb stuffed with rice. All the others who came from her region of the world are believers, and wouldn't you know it, one leads a study of the Truth in Arabic every day in "F"s home town of Anaheim. I didn't even know this teacher was coming to my house...but The Author of all this certainly did. Now, after "F"'s baptism tomorrow, she has a regular place to study in her own language and grow in her newfound faith in her own town. She will be studying alongside those who are still investigating Christianity and are from her former religion. She will also have the opportunity to improve her English. We ate, enjoyed testifying, and singing alongside an accordian with many minor chords. Brandon, the music composer of the house, joined in on the piano by ear, and had quite an education on the rhythms of middle eastern praise and worship songs. And he was going to go to the opera last night. HA! This was a heavenly opera...in my house! Many days I wish I could "go"...but this week, I'm really glad I stayed.

Sometimes we Go, Sometimes we Stay

Approximately 1 year ago my husband and I had the distinct privilege of going to Jordan to do business with our Father, and to see about business on His behalf.

Approximately 1 month ago a Jordanian woman came into my life. She has cooked for me and I have cooked for her and her friends and daughter. She speaks broken English and I know only Arabic greetings. Her friend has spoken with her for 3 years (who is a palestinian believer) and helped her investigate Christianity. She and her friend came to visit today. She professed her faith in Jesus Christ.

Would you pray for "F" as she has taken a risk. She is ready to go under the water and to study. Pray for my husband and I that we would do right by her on this journey? In celebration she and her friend are bringing an entire cooked lamb stuffed with rice to our home where we have invited other believers who are from the same region.

Sometimes we stay.

By the way, it all started at Starbucks where my son recognized their language, introduced himself and passed our number onto them.

Hahahaha And people say there is no God.

Blessings

Gabrielle and Greyson are tremendous blessings in my life. Here's why:

• Both are Gifts from God and I feel blessed on a daily basis
  
• Gaby inspires me to be a better person
• Greyson inspires me to think out of the box
  
• Gaby makes me giggle like a girl
  
• Greyson makes me laugh really loud
• Gaby knows how to be loyal and faithful
  
• Greyson knows how to love all kinds of people
  
• Gaby is super industrious
• Greyson makes every day an adventure
• Gaby gives me words of encouragement all the time
• Greyson tells me he loves me in front of his guy friends
• Gaby gives her all to what and who she believes in
• Greyson creates beautiful music to give to people
  
• Gaby creates beautiful things with her hands and gives it all away
• Greyson lights up a room
• Gaby carefully brings light to difficult situations
• Greyson's hugs help me when I'm sad or tired
• Gaby's affection comes delightfully when I least expect it and when I need it most
• Greyson gives a great foot rub or neck rub- when I need it the most
  
• Gaby listens well
  
• Greyson is concerned about what's real and chases it
• Gaby is concerned about real in relationships and works to preserve that
• Greyson can sell anything
  
• Gaby is a frugal shopper
• Greyson is a relentless romantic
• Gaby is a practitioner
• Greyson never meets a stranger
• Gaby is protective
• Greyson is full of mercy
• Gaby is full of grace

I could go on. But...you would probably be really annoyed with that. Yes, I have had hard days as a mother, just like many of you. But it doesn't change a thing. Every day counts. ...and every test is worth it. Have you counted your blessings? It is a great exercise in gratitude.

Grief

I thought it might be a good time to put some words down about living through loss in our lives. In an effort to live in obedience to God in everything, I find myself writing about the negative things in life...alot. The negative things in life hurt and people need truth and grace especially when they are hurting. I do not wish to capitalize on the doom in our lives, but to capture the life-giving truths we can extract from them.

Isaiah 45:2-3 ( look it up-you'll be glad you did) tells us that there are treasures in the darkness, hidden wealth in secret places. Although the context of this passage deals with physical wealth and treasures in the plunder, these truths translate into the passages of our hearts as well. The bottom line is that God wants His people (then and now) to know Him and that He calls His children by name. Calling us by name is an intimate act. You know how different "I love you" sounds when you add the name, "Roxanna, I love you"...especially when we're hurting.

The darkness of loss holds treasures for us if we will search for it and know God is calling us by our name in the midst of it. I would like to share some excerpts about loss from a book called Life After Loss by Bob Deits.
In regard to growing through loss on p. 99 he says, "Growth means gaining a new love and reverence for life. It means shifting your attention from the ordinary to the quality elements of life... Growth is a greater awareness of our mutual need for each other and of the sacred dimension of life... "

I'm not saying we should treasure loss or the grief. What I am saying is that the growth, the creativity, and the open doors that eventually open after loss can be considered gifts and treasures. But for the Christian, the person of Christ and His presence is the treasure in the process. If we didn't have loss, we might not experience the intimacy with Christ that happens as He dispenses His grace and presence into our lives as we call out to Him in our loss.

We experience all kinds of loss in our lives. Loss of dreams, loss of an idea, loss of a loved one through death or legal divorce or emotional divorce, loss of health, loss of finances, loss of a home, loss of lifestyle. Missionaries experience all kinds of loss in life when they enter into a new culture in it's entirety. An empty nest is a major loss for parents. If you think about it, we lose all along life's way.

Here are some quotes I like from this book that might be helpful:

• "''I know how you feel' can be words of comfort or sound like fingernails on a chalkboard."
• "Believe that your grief has a purpose and an end."
• "To go through grief also is to grow through grief."
• "Grief is not only a door-closer. Grief is also a door-opener."
• "Grief is as much about finding as it is about losing."
• "There are no shortcuts to a good and full life after a major loss."
• "...new skills, talents, and compassion emerge...." (History teaches us that in times of economic depression and struggle, it is a perfect time for inventors and entrepreneurs to emerge with fresh ideas to meet the needs of the day. )

Earl Grollman says in his book Times Remembered, "It's a risk to attempt new beginnings...Yet the greater risk is for you to risk nothing. For there will be no further possibilities of learning and changing, of traveling upon the journey of life...You were strong to hold on. You will be stronger to go forward to new beginnings."

I know some of you out there and you are walking through great loss. Relationships, jobs, faith and life long dreams. As some teenagers I know would say, "I feel ya." It is a sacred privilege to walk beside each other in it. No matter your losses as of today, be encouraged; the way out of grief (or pain) is through it. If we commit to the treasure in it, we will find great wealth and be found rich.

Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good,

One of my favorite children's books is "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day." Alexander woke up and nothing went right the rest of the day.

Monday, February 23, was a very good day. It was my birthday. Felt very loved.

Tuesday, February 24, was a bad day. I had a doctor's appointment for a regular diabetic check-up and to hopefully hear my doctor tell me that this insidious pain in my lower back that was running down my legs was NOT sciatica. So, I arrived late to check in. The receptionist was less than kind and on the border of rude. I scooted over to the next receptionist after the first one skirted me off. I'm sure he didn't understand why tears were rolling silently down my face as I handed him my co-pay. I knew my bad habits had been following me recently, and my test results were not going to be good.

I continued up the stairs to my doctor where the test results done in the previous week had shown up on his computer. Everything was up: blood pressure, cholesterol, sugar, and weight.
(Notice this blog follows the blog about going to the gym) I continued to boo-hoo in his office and he kindly responded with legal drug offers, dietetic counselors, and the reassurance that I was simply having a bad bout of sciatica and carpel tunnel syndrome. And, stress. Being a drug and alcohol addiction counselor, I opted out of the narcotic options and landed on the patch of steroids. I might be puffy, but at least I won't be addicted. Besides, if you gave me vicodin right now, I just might end up lost forever. After all, I love nitrus at the dentist.

Stress. Well, Alexander's mom told him some days were just gonna be like that. That's life.

Stress. Well, God tells us to not be afraid of the circumstances, to trust Him, and keep on keepin on. He also sends friends, unexpected phone calls, birthday cards, and notes from people who have gone before me to encourage me on this journey just when I need it. Some come behind me, but can see the forest and its beauty while we're in the forest and quite frankl,y only see tree trunks right now. God is so faithful! Thank you God! and friends who are His vessels.

So, if you're out there and having a Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day, it's going to be okay. Keep worshipping, trusting, and walking. I desire to be a comfort to you with the comfort He is giving me right now. Do you have comfort from Him that He wants you to pass on to others? Do it! You never know what big or little thing someone is going through when He's urging you to make contact.

We need a follow up book on Alexander. What is a day in the life of Alexander like now when he's all grown up? Anyone want to tackle that one?

The Gym

A few months ago I blogged about playing tennis. I am still playing, but a couple weeks ago it started raining and getting chilly and windy, so instead of walking onto the tennis courts, I've been walking into the gym.. These are the things I love about going to the gym:

1. a fresh clean towel awaits me as I check in
2. the gym is on a tennis club property with swimming pools so the walk in is always beautiful no matter what the weather is
3. the locker room smells like a combo of a little bit of sweat, bleach, moist air from the steam and fruity lotions and potions
4. My very own locker that allows me to not worry about always having my gym bag ready. It is stocked with all my back up.
5. The exercise room has carpeting and a low ceiling with low lights---I feel like I'm in someone's living room.
6. The workout is energizing. I go in tired and I leave energetic and ready to go.
7. The sweat I break feels like I am getting rid of yuk
8. The heart rate feels like I'm making deposits into my future extended life bank
9 Makes me choose better food choices
10.My trip into the steam room where I stretch out my bones, sweat, sweat, pray, and think about the problems that need solved. I leave feeling 2-3 pounds lighter.
11. The moisturizing and clean smelling lotion I put on after the shower. I leave even feeling
clean, sporty, and alive!
12. Weight lifing is fun. And I am getting a few curves in the right places!

When I am afraid

When the children were young and one or both of them would become afraid, I had a special song I would sing to them.

When I am afraid I will trust in God
When I am afraid I will trust in God
When I am afraid and I can't see my way,
I will trust Him, He cares for me.

This morning the Lord reminded me again to not be afraid.
He showed this to me because I am afraid and I can't seem to see my way clearly.
But I will trust Him, and I know He cares for me....and everyone I love.

"Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord is my strength and my song." Isaiah 12:2

Sometimes it helps for friends to trust for us until we can.... or until we can more.

Anyone want to?